To hear Tina Turner tell the story, love is just a second-hand emotion. But is it? If love is played out, old school and for the birds, then why all the Valentine’s Day fuss? Why do women hold their breath every February 14^th with the hope that the man they love will go down on bended knee, will appear at the house with a bouquet of flowers or will whisper those three little words destined to make them wild and wet? Why do men get dumped, kicked to the curb, dismissed and dissed on V-day more than any other day of the year?

Riddle me this, would Valentine’s Day have as much significance if women were getting the love they think they deserve throughout the year? Me thinks not. The importance of the day is amplified when women are the recipients of lukewarm or tepid demonstrations of love for the remaining 364 days. If women are dissatisfied and discontented in their relationship, then come February, the brother they profess to love better come with. There better be the kick ass restaurant with the violinist playing a love ballad slightly off key. There better be a small box wrapped and left on the bed with something spectacular that blinks and sparkles between the tissue paper folds. There better be more than an edible thong and flavored condoms awaiting the lady in question when she steps through the front door of her home. Death and destruction awaits any man who hasn’t done his job for the past couple of months and thinks a Hallmark card and a box of chocolate hearts will do.

Granted, the dudes have it rough. Valentine’s Day is enough to make the average man sweat. At his wife’s job, he has to outdo the co-worker whose man sent her two dozen roses, the guy from the 2^nd floor who bathed the kids and sent his lady to the spa; he has to refrain from beating to death his neighbor who chose the 14^th as the perfect day to propose. If he wants to even have a prayer of seeing any bed action, his behavior on a single day has to inspire envy and awe from one and all. It’s tough.

In this writer’s humble opinion, love cannot be scheduled. I think couples shouldn’t wait for Valentine’s Day to demonstrate their affection. In the middle of November, let the love bell ring. In January, anticipate words of rapture from your man straight out of the Love Jones script. In May, expect to be delighted and excited by flowers beautiful enough to put roses in your cheeks. Love can never be past due.

Should love be measured by the tick of the clock or by stop watch? Does the calendar make love great? Should love have a due by date?

Happy Valentine's Day

Back in the day if a man loved a woman he gave her father a horse, a cow and two mules. In them days, the price of your “PRECIOUS” to quote Gollum, cost a damn sight more than some chocolates and a Hallmark card.  Men understood that for the benefit of a lady’s time he had to put in some work. He earned her affection through the persistent pursuit of her heart. Fast forward a century and now some men have forgotten what love is about. On Valentine’s, which is the most romantic day of the year, stats show that most couple’s end up succumbing to what I call a Total Eclipse of the Heart. To translate Bonnie Tyler’s song into layman terms, it means that love fades to black. When women should be shaking the sheets on the 14^th, instead, most are showing their men the curb. I don’t have a Ph.D. in Sexual Healing but there is a reason for the fallout.